The Consequences of Yaoi
by SergeantSarcasm7
Summary: The Fandom must repent for the Yaoi of Hetalia. There must be consequences for Yaoi. These consquences are KIDS! Warning; lots and lots of pairings like; FrUk, SuFin, Spamono, Gerita, and others.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: The Consequences of Bring Your Child to the Meeting Day.**

For good reasons, bring your city to the meeting day was a rare occasion. Normally, the countries do not talk about their children let alone bring them to a meeting. They do not understand them and consider them strange. Apparently, countries do not mix well. It is said that they are the consequences of Yaoi.

As the guards stood in front of the French doors leading to the meeting room, they could already hear the loud arguing. Guard number one looked at the time. The meeting had not even started yet.

It was about to begin, and it was already getting loud.

Inside the door, the countries were sitting or standing around the table. It was not large enough to fit all the countries and their children. As everyone else was too distracted and arguing, a fabulous and ostentatious girl wearing a white scarf like Sherlock Holmes faced the fourth wall…

"Bonjour, I am known as the English Channel! But can you call me Guinevere!" she said

"FrUk Child, who are you talking to?" asked Japan. Guinevere looked away from the fourth wall.

"TO THE FANDOM!" she said a bit too loudly.

"She got that from you, Angleterre…" France said.

"Shut up, frog!" England replied while everyone else looked at her confused.

"Let's just continue the meeting." Germany said.

"Ve~ Germany! Can we introduce ours first!"

A girl sitting on Germany's lap started to bounce up and down, "Can we, can we, can we!"

"Fine…"

Italy, another guy, and the girl jumped in the air, "Yay!"

Germany sighed.

"Ve~ I'm-a Adele! I'm-a 19!"

"I'm Klaus and I am 21" said the other guy that jumped in the air.

A brunette with his hair slicked back sitting by Germany said, "And I am Alois. 20."

"What about your fourth child?" England asked.

Italy and Germany looked at each other awkwardly.

"We don't talk about Bobby…"

"Ja…" Germany agreed.

"Time to introduce mine, da?" Russia said walking behind a girl with long black hair and purple eyes. Russia put his chin on her head and hands on her shoulders. "This one is Sunflower and is ten, da? On my right is Mulan and on my left is Tuan."

"They are all triplets, aru." China added.

"Well you guys were busy!" America said.

"THEY JUST CAME OUT OF NOWHERE, ARU!"

"IT'S BECAUSE OF THE FANDOM!" Guinevere yelled and started to run around the room.

Watching his daughter's panic, England murmured something about this being France's and Russia's fault. He jumped when she popped up behind him.

"I do not refrain from speaking and sense the fandom!"

"Maybe you should try to refrain from speaking…" A neko resembling Japan and Greece said as she leaned back in her chair slowly starting to doze off.

Belarus was about to say something but America interrupted her, "DUDES! Dudes! You should totally let me introduce my children!" Belarus elbowed him in the stomach and he coughed up blood.

"Our children!" she said.

America coughed, "oh yeah…"

A boy with blue eyes and light blonde hair introduced self, "I'm Sam Winchester! I hunt demons and save my older sister from trouble!"

The girl next to him groaned, "Stop saying you're that guy from supernatural! Your name is Samuel F. Jones! My name is Ruby by the way."

"I don't believe you tricked me into naming them after characters from Supernatural!" Belarus said. "Big brother never would have done that."

America sits in the emo-corner growing mushrooms, "Big brother this… big brother that…"

"Tomate junior, would you like to introduce yourself next?" Spain asked.

"IT'S TJ! TJ, PAPA BASTARD!"

"I'm-a so proud of you." Romano placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't-a touch me!" Romano and Spain backed away slowly. TJ moved to the corner of the room and started reading smutty fanfics on her phone.

"And here is our daughter, Veronica" Finland said.

"TW' M'RE M'NTHS T'LL CH'RSTM'S!" she screamed in a Swedish accent.

"C'lm d'wn." Sweden said.

Veronica glares at Sweden, "never papa…"

"Ve~ I love Christmas too!" Adele said.

Veronica's stare turned to Adele. "You are my w'f, now."

"Don't touch our sister!" her two brothers said together.

"I 'm s' pr'ud 'f y'u." Sweden said.

TJ looked up from her phone, "Eh, I'm not a fan of Yuri…" She looked back to her the Gertalia* fanfiction she was reading.

"Hey, what about us one-night standers?" An older version of Sealand asked.

A chorus of various 'no's in various languages was the reply. The UsUk, PruAus, and TurEce* children left the room. They are also known as the One Night Stand Trio.

"I. Better. Follow. Them. They. Will. Make. A. Mess. Out. Of. My. House." Turkey said and left the room.

All the children's phones went off, and a violin played furiously.

Kitty, the Japan and Greece neko child, translated for the AusHun child, "He says; 'TJ, STOP SENDING ME THESE!'"

"Wow, wannabeapasta, I want to meet you to exchange smut writing tips." Guinevere said.

With that said, all the OTP children started reading the M-rated Gertalia fanfic. Well, besides for Adele. Her phone was taken away by one of her big brothers. The room went quiet.

Then they heard the guard's yells and grunts. Bursting through the door, a large man like Germany entered the room.

In a deep voice, he started yelling "VE~!"

And that was how the meeting came to an end with helicopters in the air and SWAT teams.

* * *

***Gertalia-Italy tops. **

***TurEce- we do not know the shipping name for Turkey and Greece. Please correct us.**

**Seriously, if we wrote a pair wrong please, in the nicest way possible, correct us. **

**If you also don't ship a ship, please be polite about it. This is what we think, this is what we ship.**

**I bet you are confused by this 'we' thing. This story is written by four people; Guinevere, Adele, Veronica, and TJ, AKA SergeantSarcasm7, DEMONBYRD14, sillypony8, and 1captain obvious.**

**Also, these children have no real influence or representation of anything besides the consequences of yaoi. They are found under rocks. **

**Hope you enjoyed this story! Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:** **The Consequences of Detention at OTP Academy.**

The countries had to dump their kids somewhere. Why not make a school for them? This school was called OTP academy. The name is self-explanatory.

In the school, all the students are the children of the countries, but there are also some exchange students from other fandoms. They take classes from various kinds of teachers including other countries, therapists, and hobos if security is not very good that day.

_It was the first day of school_

When the last of the students were settling in detention, the only sound that was heard was the typing on Estonia's computer. "No Talking" was written in large letters on the wipe board.

While the FrUk child listened to the nothingness of the air, she fiddled around with her scarf mindlessly until she got an idea. Excitedly, she tore pieces of paper from her notebook and scribbled on them. Estonia did not notice her throwing crumpled pieces of paper across the room. After giving weird looks to her, everyone in the room read the notes.

Estonia looked up from his computer. In front of him, blocking his view was Adele, the GerIta child.

"May I help you?" Estonia asked.

With an irresistible downcast look, she said, "Mister Estonia? Can you help me with my technology homework?"

Estonia's face flushed. In the inside, Adele thought of a horrible idea for later. On the Outside, she kept giving him her cutest look.

Out of sight, the other students were preparing and whispering among each other.

"Okay, we're going to need a trampoline, a ladder, a rope, and a Speedo." Guinevere said.

"What? Why?" Asked Kitty as a violin played behind her. "He says that is ridiculous."

Guinevere laughed, "I was just kidding. TJ, do have the rope?"

"Yes, I have-a the rope."

"Okay, let's go; Onwards!"

Estonia did not notice the OTP academy students sneak up behind him. His struggles were futile. As his screams were muffled by Guinevere's scarf, he was tied up faster than a snail on a cheetah.

The SuFin child carried him to the closet and dropped him inside. Adele smirked and wrote "Pedo" on his forehead. Then the door was closed.

The FrUk child grinned at the success of her well thought-out plan.

"What the FrUk do we do now that the Mochi-Bastard is in the closet?" TJ asked.

"I don't know…" Guinevere said.

"HUNT DEMONS!" Sam said. Adele elbowed him in the stomach and he coughed up blood.

Randomly, a thought popped into the FrUk child's head.

"Hey, Adele, what was on your phone that got England so angry?" Guinevere asked.

"Oh…"

_It was right before second period English. England was teaching and Sam, Guinevere, and Adele were in the class. _

_Adele was on her phone. She was so enveloped in what she was doing she did not notice the bushy-brows staring over her shoulder and the bell ringing._

"_Adele. Give me your phone." _

"_Uh…."_

"_Hand it over."_

"_Okay Mr. England….." Adele handed England the phone. He looked at it. Everyone watched as he was reading what was written in the notes. His face was of pure horror so much it seemed like his irises and pupils went missing. He walked over to his desk, put her phone in it to burn later, and grabbed some paper and a pencil off the desk. Suddenly, a detention slip was stuck to Adele's forehead. _

"…the fanfiction I was writing…"

"Oh, you write fanfiction? What is your user name?"

"…wannabeapasta…"

"IT WAS YOU ALL ALONG!" TJ screamed.

"Was it the FrUk one you posted today?" Kitty asked. A violin was heard behind her. "He says to stop writing fanfiction… and the AusHun Fic you wrote scarred him for life."

"I enjoyed the FrUk one." Guinevere said.

The AusHun Child played his violin some more. "He says you both are cosmos." Kitty was punched in the arm and Kitty hissed back. "You are both psychos"

Ignoring the comment, Adele asked, "Hey Guinevere, all I heard when England sent his own child to detention were English swear words. What did you do?"

"_Okay class, today we will be picking books for your classic book report."_

_A hand shot up immediately._

"_Yes, Sam?"_

"_Can I read Twilight for my book report?"_

"_What! Of course not!"_

"_Why not?"_

"_Because it is not classic literature."_

"_It has movies based on it. Of course it is!" _

_England's eyebrows twitched. "You cannot use Twilight for your book report!"_

_Sam yelled, "WHY?!"_

_England grabbed his head and banged his head against the desk. "_Twilight_. Isn't. Literature!"_

_England returned to his desk but when he looked at his students again, he saw his daughter in the corner reading something. He stood in front of her desk._

"_WHAT ARE YOU READING?" _

"'_Fifty Shades of Grey'" she said._

"_WHAT! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT BOOK?"_

"_On the high bookshelf in the FrUk room."_

"_HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO TAKE THE BOOKS IN OUR BEDROOM?!"_

"_But pere* France said…"_

"_DON'T LISTEN TO THAT FROG!"_

"_But Dean said…"_

"_DON'T LISTEN TO THOSE BLOODY FRENCHIES!"_

_Guinevere stood up from her seat. "I'M FRENCH TOO!"_

_England hit her in the head with her book. "DETENTION!"_

"…He was angry that I was reading 'Fifty Shades of Grey.'" Guinevere said.

"At least you didn't get a concussion!" Sam said, "Hey, Kitty, Arnold, how did you two get in here?"

"Eh, I feel asleep in class and then Arnold got in trouble for waking me. He played so loud he probably woke my dad all the way in Greece."

Everyone in the room said in sync, "THAT'S WHAT THAT WAS!"

"That sounded like a cat dying!" the FrUk child said

"A cat was dying. It was me. I lost a life." She sighed, "The sound of a screeching violin is a bad way to die…."

"I-I'm sorry…" said the AusHun child.

"WE SHIP IT!" Adele, Guinevere, and TJ screamed.

"YOU CAN TALK?!" said the PruCan child.

The FrUk child turned around, "Who are you?"

"I'm the awesome Gabriel."

"We seriously need to cosplay supernatural some time." Sam said and received an elbow in the stomach.

"I knew you were going to say something like that around now…" Ruby said

"Wait… how long have you been here?" Sam asked.

"I have been standing by Gabriel the whole time!"

"Who?" everyone in the room asked

"I'M THE AWESOME GABRIEL!" he screamed at the top of his lungs.

Nobody heard him. Not even Perre who flew into him. He was sent to check up on the kids in detention.

"Hey, how long are we going to keep Estonia in the closet?" Adele asked.

Everyone turned to find the SuFin child about to stab Estonia with a sharpened pencil.

The SuFin child put the pencil behind her back, "I wasn't going to kill anyone… just injure him… painfully…"

"CAN WE DO IT THE MAFIA-WAY!?" Adele asked.

"Anything for m' w'f!"

And so they spent the rest of detention torturing Estonia like reading smut aloud, making him listen to heavy Finnish death metal, and putting him into Supernatural cosplay.

* * *

***I spelt that without one of those things on top of the e. I could not fix it. french for father i believe**

**WELL, WE HOPED YOU LOVED THIS CHAPTER! IT WAS A BLAST TO WRITE! WHY AM I TALKING IN CAPS? BECAUSE ZE AWESOM GABRIEL WONT STOP PRESSING THE CAP LOCKS BUTTON!  
**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:** **The Consequences of the Great Dalmuti of Menstruation.**

**Warning contains sharks, blood, swearing, emotional outbursts, the mafia, and the male gender's worse nightmare.**

After bonding over bondage, the FrUk child, the GerIta child, the SuFin child, and the SpaMano child decided to become roomies, which made people wonder why God was so cruel. Poor Kitty was the one who had to deal with them all.

_It was a Sunday…_

"GIMME ZE MONEY!"

"You said I had till Monday!"

"VELL I VANT IT NOW!"

Lying on the ground, Sam was beat up, bruised, and injured. He reached out for his sister and whispered, "Help me…"

"You're on your own." Ruby walked away and left her brother to face the wrath of Adele.

While Adele was beating Sam up to a pulp, the SuFin child was in the corner cowering in fear and TJ and Guinevere were both crying with the mafia behind them.

"jou have an hour to give me ze money or else I'm taking all of jour Supernatural merchandise!" Adele said.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT MY DEAN PLUSHIE AND CASTEL SLIPPERS! THEY GIVE ME WINGS AND PROTECT ME FROM DEMONS!"

Kitty turned to Arnold, "Can I stay at your house, tonight?"

Arnold played his violin furiously.

"Oh come on! Pwease!" Kitty did a cute neko pose. Arnold gave in.

* * *

After dealing with the situation, Adele returned to their shared dorm room covered in blood. She walked in as Guinevere and TJ were watching Hetaoni walkthroughs and sobbing.

"Vhat are jou crying about, jou sissies!

With a handkerchief, the FrUk child swung her head side to side sobbing. "You heartless, you brute!"

"IT'S JUST A GAME!"

"What about your half-brother, Steve Jr." TJ said

"If mama says it never happened, it never happened."

"Honhonhon, but it did happen" Guinevere said.

Adele tackles Guinevere to the ground, "TAKE ZAT BACK! TAKE ZAT BACK!"

"Don't you mean take us back?" TJ asked

Veronica witnessed Adele drag the FrUk and SpaMano child up stairs and never saw them again.

"Me w'f… why? WHY?!"

Kitty walked in. "I came for my stuff." She noticed the SuFin child sobbing on the floor and chose to refrain from speaking. As quickly as possible, she got her stuff and left.

Later, Sam dropped off the money. "I really hate you Dean…" he said and then left.

* * *

_The next day… may god save us all…_

* * *

"CH'C'L'T'! CH'C'L'T'! CH'C'L'T'!" Veronica screamed like that fish from SpongeBob.

The whole classroom was in the corner shaking in fear.

"YOU'LL NEVER GET MY SPANISH CHOCOLATE, IKEA BASTARD!"

"What did you say about IKEA, Spanish scum?"

"YOU HEARD ME, I-K-E-A BASTARD!"

"Taste my Danish axe!"

"I got mine from Spain, IKEA BASTARD!"

"Bring it on stupid tomato!"

Axes, tomatoes and magic were shed that day…

Suddenly, a smell of chocolate filled the room. Both of the children paused mid-swing. They turned their head to the corner of the room.

In the corner of the room, Adele was eating _the _Spanish chocolate. Darkness like grim fairytales petrified the class even more. England was swearing and France was squeezing England while he was doing so. Oblivious, Adele started licking her chocolate covered fingers.

Veronica and TJ twitched.

"Oh, this was yours?"

The two looked at each other in tacit agreement.

"FOR CHOCOLATE!"

They ran toward Adele suddenly dressed up like a conquistador and Viking, magical outfit change!

Adele's countenance was morphed into moral terror.

Moral for educational purposes: Don't. Steal. Chocolate.

* * *

_Math class…_

* * *

"Mister Russia…?"

"Yes, Guinevere?"

"Can you help me with this math problem…?"

"Anything for you, Alisochka," Russia walked to her desk. Both of them focused on the math problem. What a wonderful distraction and opportunity for something to go wrong.

Bursting through the door, an Italian man wearing a suit came barging in. Behind the doorway you could see a lot more men.

"TJ and Veronica, you may have beaten me last time, but this time I brought my men! We are the best mafia in this town!"

"Whoa, so you mean, there are other Mafia's in this town?" Sam asked

"No, no I-I mean in-a Italia! Yeah!" Adele chuckled nervously.

"You and I both know that I can beat your men easily… AND I MEAN ALL OF THEM!" boasted TJ

Adele laughed, "I know… but you cannot beat them and ME!"

"Bring it on, Mafia-Bastard!"

"Let's D-d-d-d-d-duel!" Kitty yelled

* * *

_-Duel time skip-_

* * *

"I place one card down and end my turn…"

"THEY AREN'T PLAYING YU-GI-OH. THEY ARE BATTLING TO THE DEATH! 'LL F'R S'M' ST'P'D CH'C'L'T'"

Sam looked at Veronica confused "Wait, didn't you also b—"

"SSSSHHH I broke Uncle Denmark's axe, I want to live until he kills me!"

"You're quite good at fighting…" Adele said

"I am your body guard, aren't I?"

Adele panted, "Oh, yeah… well... YOU'RE FIRED!" Adele paused… "Until next Tuesday…"

"Tomorrow's Tuesday." TJ said

"SHUT UP!" Adele tackled TJ.

Terrified, Guinevere noticed Russia on the verge of killing everyone in the room for destroying the classroom. Feeling disgruntled by the country's aura, Guinevere was thinking of ways to stop this hormonal mess. Then she remembered Adele's weakness from the years she spent time at her house. 'Where am I going to get a spider?"

Conveniently, one of those creepy creatures decided to fly right into Guinevere's face. After she panicked, she took the spider. Guinevere then stood up, and she prayed this would work.

Guinevere walked over in front of Adele. Guinevere looked at her silently and quickly dropped the spider down her shirt.

Adele ran out of the classroom screaming "GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT!"

"It had to be done." Guinevere said while feeling horrible.

This class period, GUINEVERE WAS THE HERO!

"But… but… I am…" Sam said.

DON'T QUESTION THE NARIATOR.

* * *

Between the two buildings, Guinevere looked at the rain falling down. The droplets were falling heavily. Although the FrUk child was somewhat used to the rain. She looked up at the gray sky drearily.

"No… my hair will get wet." Guinevere trudged on to her health class.

* * *

"PLEEEEEEAAAAASE! PÉRE, JUST LET ME GO HOME!"

At this point, Guinevere did not care how un-lady-like she may have been, how everyone was watching her, or how she would have schoolwork to make up. All she wanted to do was go home, pour herself a cup of tea, lay on the couch, and read a 'book'.

"I'm sorry, but if I do England won't want to [censored] tonight"

"Come on, please, don't you care that I die!"

"I do but…"

"HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOUR HAIR GOT WET!"

*Le gasp* France, the health teacher, looked at her daughter giving him _ZE _face.

"Fine… I'll say you got sick in the rain but…"

"Thank you thank you thank you!" the FrUk child hugged her father.

On her way out of the building, she walked out with the feeling of 'See-you-later-losers'.

Not without more incidents, the week passed. Shark week ended, and Kitty was happy to return until she got a surprise.

* * *

**Great Dalmuti Rankings**

**Great Dalmuti; FrUk**

**Lesser Dalmuti; SpanMano**

**Lesser ****Peon****; SuFin**

**Greater Peon; GerIta**

**We won't explain this, da?**

**Review por favor.**


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